Posts in Reflecting
Reflective Narratives
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The business of fashion is very complex.

Getting the brand ethos right, the garments and how you align yourself in the grand scheme of things ie the fashion world is a lot harder than I had anticipated. 

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Reflecting on the brand and making changes today has led to a larger overall idea. One final push with the current collection due to the spring summer season being upon us. 

Hopefully this will in turn generate funds for a new collection. One that is more refined.  

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Some changes have been made to the name of a couple of t-shirts to make the narrative stronger. Each garment has a story behind it, which I hope to convey in the next couple of months.  

So back to the research drawing board, to the funding options and contacting micro-influencers.  

And in terms of the larger reflective concepts behind what I am trying to achieve is the 'ripple effect', a shift into peoples social conscience, to talk and debate about diversity and representation, why visibility matters and why everybody should champion it.

Growing up

as a teenager is always a precarious time. Navigating your way through parental and societal expectations. Not to mention that of your friends. 

Primary school was a tricky time.  

Secondary school was slightly more forgiving. Maybe I had developed enough sassiness to ward off any potential haters.  

They existed. They said hurtful things and treated me badly at times.  But this is not a pity party nor the space for this.  

What is interesting for me is how I utilised those feelings and reflect on them now.

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The most prominent feelings were of wanting to be ‘different’, not in terms of my ethnic identity - how I defined myself. But more of how I fitted in with the ‘misfits’. Power in numbers. The grunge kids of the day. It was fun to belong and I was accepted without question.  

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My identity became about self expression in terms of how I dressed, dyed my hair, conformed to a prescribed look. And ignored any feelings to do with my heritage.

It was simpler. 

It was fun to bleach my hair a honey blond colour. I liked the admiration I got for it. My Nan, I remember was absolutely distraught at how I “had ruined my beautiful black hair”. It is only hair I thought, it will grow back. 

Later on it became pillar box red.  

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Always the rebel. My mum had taught me to be independent and do what I felt passionate about. Do it with conviction. 

I must remember that on this journey, this business, this platform I wanted to create. To do it with core values and concepts at the core. 

Back to black as I was reaching my twenties 

Back to black as I was reaching my twenties 

As the next chapter approached I started to question my identity more and embrace it. More on that next week.  

Half Term Business P.O.A

Being active is great and being creatively active is even better. Now to get over the feeling of exhaustion. Waking up a couple of hours later is such a joy especially when there is sunlight. I am not a winter person. 

Anyway let’s not focus on the negative... 

Having exhibited three times over the past two months I have been focussed on keeping the flow going and seeking other opportunities to be a part of. It really helps having deadlines and thinking of new pieces to create. But more importantly feeling inspired. 

London is a great city to seek inspiration from and there are new developments, spaces and options to be involved in. Just this weekend alone there were more zine exhibitions, openings of galleries and others shows to visit. It really is great.  Visiting various spaces always helps get the creative juices flowing. 

Speaking to other women who are involved in the art/photography/publishing world is always a booster as you find out other perspectives, their views on certain issues and compare the struggles you face. It has made me realise I need to seek out a group to be a part of where I can discuss my work but also how my experiences feed into it and the struggles I face, particularly when it comes to topics such as race and ethnicity. How I self identify and what it means in a world full of labels, fitting in and if we really should. Should I care about the label? Should I care about how people perceive me?

These are issues I am going to explore in a new painting, which will be interesting as I have never done this before, made myself the subject of the work. And moreover exposing some of my emotions as that can be quite raw for an artist and exposing but I feel it is important as there is quite a lot of anxiety around this subject matter at the moment and well, making the business as a whole successful. It is hard as I battle from day to day with feeling like I am a fraud, what am I doing and what is the point. To feeling happy about exhibiting in different spaces and physically being out there a bit more. This is not new territory in terms of artists or creative people battling with these concepts. I guess that is where you have to be selfish, do what you want as it feels right and you are passionate about it and shut out the negativity in the process. Screw the haters right? 

So, in addition to the painting, I have made a list of things to achieve by the end of this week. As a minimum:

  • write an artist cv
  • a statement
  • apply to two exhibitions
  • start the lookbook on indesign for the brand so I can contact people in the fashion world and start the drawings for the new painting mentioned above.
  • Oh and contact some Zines to see if they would be interested in publishing some articles I have previously wrote or maybe I could write something for a new theme? We will see on that front and in terms of my list of priorities, it is not that important as I am not a writer but I am interested in exploring some thoughts on paper. 

Today I will complete the CV I have started, make some progress on the statement and double check the criteria for the art work submissions.  

Here is a very rough draft of the painting I am thinking of creating 

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Right best get on with being productive.